Sometimes at night, I like to lay in the grass and look up at the stars. There are so many, like prayers scattered across the black velvet sky. There was a time when one of my prayers was up there, but it’s been answered now. Looking at the stars is like looking into the past. Their light travels so far that by the time it reaches us the star might already be dead. I could be looking at a sky that no longer exists.
During the day I’d rather forget the past. I’m moving forward into a new future, one where people don’t treat me good because of what I’ve done not because of what’s been done to me. I’ve put all that behind me now. My no-good family and their criminal ways are in another state. It’s almost like they’re in another world.
I’m starting over in my own world, with my own friends, and in my own apartment. During the day life is good. I work at a bookstore and eat pizza with friends. It’s the nighttime that is difficult. The past has a way of finding me when I sleep. It creeps in and throws itself across me stifling my breath. When I go outside I can breathe again and when I look at the stars the past doesn’t seem as overwhelming. So I sleep beneath the stars and I let the light from the past lead me to my future.
